MetaMinds

As an elementary school teacher, I was passionate about helping students cultivate self-awareness and resilience through the everyday stressors, conflicts and delights that come with learning. These were skills I wish I had learned, so I didn’t attack myself for making mistakes and chase after praise as a way of building confidence.

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In the classroom, I was giving, over-giving, and then … burning out. I ignored my body’s whispers of “this is too much.” The health issues began piling up; my body’s whispers became shouts. 

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So, I began working with a Somatic Experiencing (SE) Practitioner to help my body heal. During that time, I also explored this persistent pattern of meeting every request with a friendly, reflexive “yes,” even when I knew something didn’t fit or feel right. The desire to be liked and stay connected often came at a great price… abandoning myself. SE helped me realize how this pattern was just one of many adaptive strategies I developed in childhood as a way of trying to keep the peace, stay safe and receive affection. Yet knowing that didn’t shift my behavior one bit…I still kept doing it! And, I beat myself up for doing so.

 

Since SE had helped my thyroid heal, I was able to avoid an invasive surgical procedure. My hair stopped falling out, my digestive system began functioning, and I finally felt more energized. The heavy fog had lifted, and that fun-spirited vitality returned! So, I enrolled in the Somatic Experiencing Practitioner training. During that time, I was introduced to Inner Relationship Focusing (IRF). IRF’s gentle and empowering process helped me untangle that people-pleasing pattern. What once seemed un-shiftable had finally begun to shift. And, that was only the beginning!

 

I went from being highly self-critical to more on my side…from reactive and anxious to more steady and resilient. These invigorating, beyond-what-I-thought-possible shifts inspired me to study directly with Ann Weiser Cornell and Barbara McGavin so I could become a Certified IRF Professional and Trainer. No more career changes! 

 

I continue leaning into the steadying support of SE and IRF because, as a friend recently put it, "Life keeps life-ing." It's not about getting rid of how we feel, fixing it, changing it, or hushing it but rather being with with our experience, just as it is, so it can shift naturally and we can move forward.